Things I’ll be doing differently with baby no2

As they say hindsight is a wonderful thing, this probably couldn’t be more true when it comes to raising children as the whole process just feels a lot like guess work and blind dumb luck. With this in mind there are a number of things that I would try to do differently with our second child to hopefully make the process of having a newborn a little easier for us second time around. Here’s the list of things I’m hoping to do differently:

1) Don’t hold the baby while he’s sleeping.

I think this by far was our biggest pit fall with Jake, we held him while we got him to sleep and then during the day as I was just resting and recovering from the c section I would continue to hold him the whole time he slept. I enjoyed being close to him, watching him sleeping and breathing in and out and falling in love with him, but I can see now that this is the reason why he also demanded to be held while he slept through the night also. Meaning Jamie and I slept in shifts so that one person could always be awake and holding Jake. This is not going to work for us at all second time around! So the baby will only know sleeping in a Moses basket / crib, of this I am quite determind.

2) Expressing some bottle feeds.

I intend to breastfeed again as I did with Jake. However due to family circumstances there were a few times that Jake had to be away for me for a few hours at a time, so I expressed his feeds into bottles. However as we weren’t regularly giving Jake a bottle feed he really struggled to get any milk and the whole process was very traumatic for both Jake and the person looking after him. This time round I intend to give the baby more expressed bottle feeds, perhaps one a day once we have established breastfeeding so that if circumstances do arise beyond my control I don’t need to be as concerned about the baby going hungry. This also will likely be helpful with me getting some more sleep as it will allow Jamie to do one of the evening feeds.

3) Have the house more prepared in advance of the birth.

At the time we felt we were prepared for Jake’s arrival, the house was clean and all his clothes we’re put away ready etc. We didn’t however have any frozen meals or easy to cook meals stocked up in the house in advance as we failed to see how difficult feeding ourselves was going to be with a newborn, as it turns out it was surprisingly difficult. We didn’t manage to get out and do a proper weekly shop for about the first month so Jamie had to keep rushing out to the local shop to buy a few bits here and there to see us through the next couple of days. This just added extra stress and cost to a time when we were too tired to think clearly. This time round I intend to have the freezer filled to the brim with pre made meals ( I’m sure some ready meals may creep in) as well as having my cupboards fully stocked with tins and dry goods and plenty of healthy food for Jake.

4) knowing when to say no to people.

Of course when you have a new baby in the family everyone wants to meet him and you want to show him off to the world also. However there were a few times with Jake when I was just so so so tired that having visitors in the house was actually painful for me to force myself to stay awake, look happy and not cry. This time round I know that the people who are visiting are all people who care for me and my family so they should understand if we have to cut a visit short or if I say they are welcome to stay and baby sit for as long as they want, as long as I can go to bed ( this would actually be quite ideal!)

Everyone says that having baby no2 is a lot easier then it was the first time round and I’m really hoping that they are right and that if we do manage to make these changes to how we do things it will makes things go as smoothly as possible for us. Only time will tell…..

4 thoughts on “Things I’ll be doing differently with baby no2

  1. Enjoyed reading this as we’ve just had number two. I’ve found I’m much more relaxed with the baby this time around, probably because I’e had to be. The biggest challenge is managing the toddler, especially when I’m home alone and breastfeeding. Her baby brother seems easy! He doesn’t move from where you put him (yet!), doesn’t shout very loudly, doesn’t change his mind every five seconds. When she’s at nursery on Wednesdays it generally feels a breeze! That said, when she was a baby and we were first-time parents it felt much tougher. Hindsight is a wonderful thing!

    Anyway, rest assured there’s little chance to hold a baby while it sleeps second time around! But I do agree that getting them into good sleeping habits as early as possible pays off so much in terms of keeping your sanity. The older they get the harder it is to break habits – a book I read said that by 3 or 4 months they are quite set in their ways and it’s much tougher to make changes after that. You can get away with the odd sleepy cuddle, well we seem to anyway, but we haven’t made it the norm so Little Mister will settle himself.

    Like you, I had plans to express more this time after Little Miss point blank refused a bottle when we tried to introduce it two months in last time around. However, it hasn’t happened. I hate expressing. It always seemed such a faff and so time consuming once you’ve got all the kit ready then sat and did it. Time seems in such short supply this time around that I haven’t been able to bring myself to put expressing very high up the list of things to do and now I fear it’s probably too late again. It would be nice to be able to do one bottle feed a day so probably would be worth the effort. I have found breastfeeding more tiring this time round.

    Good luck with it all!

  2. Congratulations! It really is more relaxed with no 2 although you suddenly wonder what you did with all your spare time when you only had 1 baby (same as you do when you go from no children!)

  3. Really interesting post, there are definitely some things we will be doing differently this time around too, hindsight really is a wonderful thing!! We stocked our freezer full of food last time and have done the same this time already as it worked so well in those first weeks! The expressing is interesting as I expressed a feed for monkey every day for hubby to feed him with. He would like to do the same this time but I am not sure as I found expressing quite tiring and that I didn’t actually get much extra rest … Plus all the expressing increases your supply and I always had a huge supply anyway. It is different for everyone though and who knows maybe we will do the same again anyway! Xx

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